How not to lose the plot

TIDY TOM starts an allotment diary

Hello, and welcome to my column. I’ve had an allotment in Hastings for three years, and had allotments in towns I’ve lived in before. In fact I’ve been tending vegetables ever since I was a child, in gardens, nurseries and farms all over the country. But I still see myself as an enthusiastic amateur learning from trial and error.

I’ve now come to the conclusion that the plot’s previous tenants can’t have ever used any fertiliser or manure as the soil is so poor; and that they almost certainly used a rotavator, the palindromic tillage device for the lazy, as the soil is in an okay tilth for the top 5 inches, then turns to rock-hard clay, indicating that much of it probably got blown away by the wind.

So I have gone on the offensive in a digging-in spree. I’ve collected numerous bags of seaweed from the beach along by Winchelsea. Seaweed is a useful source of nutrients and a good activator for compost heaps. And I’ve spread some on the surface of a bed to plant garlic and autumn onions into.

I’ve also collected horse manure from someone who was giving it away — I don’t see the point of actually paying for shit; and collected a huge load of spent hops from the brewery in Lewes who give them away. I even cut down some nettles in my dad’s garden and brought them up to compost as they’re a good source of nitrogen.

I plan to get half the beds double-dug this Autumn and to do the rest next year, to try and break the pan-up caused by the rotavating. And I’ll plant a hedge along the seaward side to try and keep out the salty wind. As it’s free, I’m going to use willow, which doesn’t seem to mind the fierce wind.

This last season has been reasonably successful. I still can’t grow carrots — either carrot fly get them, or a badger comes and digs them up. I like badgers, but they’re a bloody nuisance to have on an allotment, though they do eat slugs…

The onions grew well, despite not really getting enough water, and are now hanging up in my kitchen with the garlic, in such a picturesque way that I’m reluctant to spoil the display by eating it. Beetroot does quite well; it’s naturally a coastal plant that doesn’t mind salt.

This year I’ve got high hopes for sweet potatoes. They may not be cost effective as the young shoots (called ‘slips’) were rather expensive, but I’ve done everything I can to give them a good home, and they seem to be doing okay. I’ll dig them up next month and let you know.

Something else new to me are chickpeas. I use a lot of these in cooking, so thought I’d see if I could grow them. I should have worked out that 50 plants would take up a lot of room, but they looked so small as seedlings! So I’m somewhat overwhelmed with them and each pod only has 1 or 2 peas in it.

Finally, and saving the best until last, I thought I’d have a go at growing pumpkins this year. My excuse is that someone gave me the seeds; I wouldn’t have bought them as like any rational person I loath pumpkins. Only one plant grew, but it’s taken over about a quarter of my plot, and has produced just one enormous fruit, which has to be the ugliest thing I’ve ever grown.

September 09

Also in: Green Times