How to be a pirate
You need a patch, and a wooden leg
And a funny name like ‘Bob the Peg’
You need a parrot and maybe a hook
And a telescope through which you look
You need some breeches and a flouncy shirt
And never ever wash – pirates like dirt
You need big gold earrings and blackened teeth
And Jolly Roger underpants underneath
You need barrels of rum and treasure in chests
And planks for walking and high crows nests
You need a big old ship and a motley crew
And you need a treasure map or two
You need to say things like `Yo ho ho!’
And go places others fear to go
You need to be ruthless and mean and rude
And not mind maggots in your food
You need a cutlass and blunderbuss
And you need to swear and you need to cuss
You need bad breath and a dose of scurvy
And a figure head all carved and curvy
If you’re swash-buckling, bold and brave
And don’t feel sick with every wave
If you’ve a three-cornered hat and scar or two
A pirate’s life could be the one for you
So shiver me timbers and yo-heave-ho
Come on board and off we go!
Yes come and sail the ocean blue
A pirate’s life’s the one for you.
©Kate Tym 2011
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